the most beautiful things in life are not things; they are people and places, memories and pictures. they are feelings and moments, smiles and laughter

Thursday, 21 August 2014

Notes To Future Son: Date a Girl Who Reads

“You should date a girl who reads.

Date a girl who reads. Date a girl who spends her money on books instead of clothes, who has problems with closet space because she has too many books. Date a girl who has a list of books she wants to read, who has had a library card since she was twelve.

Find a girl who reads. You’ll know that she does because she will always have an unread book in her bag. She’s the one lovingly looking over the shelves in the bookstore, the one who quietly cries out when she has found the book she wants. You see that weird chick sniffing the pages of an old book in a secondhand book shop? That’s the reader. They can never resist smelling the pages, especially when they are yellow and worn.

She’s the girl reading while waiting in that coffee shop down the street. If you take a peek at her mug, the non-dairy creamer is floating on top because she’s kind of engrossed already. Lost in a world of the author’s making. Sit down. She might give you a glare, as most girls who read do not like to be interrupted. Ask her if she likes the book.

Buy her another cup of coffee.

Let her know what you really think of Murakami. See if she got through the first chapter of Fellowship. Understand that if she says she understood James Joyce’s Ulysses she’s just saying that to sound intelligent. Ask her if she loves Alice or she would like to be Alice.

It’s easy to date a girl who reads. Give her books for her birthday, for anniversaries. Give her the gift of words, in poetry and in song. Give her Neruda, Pound, Sexton, Cummings. Let her know that you understand that words are love. Understand that she knows the difference between books and reality but by god, she’s going to try to make her life a little like her favorite book. It will never be your fault if she does.

She has to give it a shot somehow.

Lie to her. If she understands syntax, she will understand your need to lie. Behind words are other things: motivation, value, nuance, dialogue. It will not be the end of the world.

Fail her. Because a girl who reads knows that failure always leads up to the climax. Because girls who read understand that all things must come to end, but that you can always write a sequel. That you can begin again and again and still be the hero. That life is meant to have a villain or two.

Why be frightened of everything that you are not? Girls who read understand that people, like characters, develop. Except in the Twilight series.

If you find a girl who reads, keep her close. When you find her up at 2 AM clutching a book to her chest and weeping, make her a cup of tea and hold her. You may lose her for a couple of hours but she will always come back to you. She’ll talk as if the characters in the book are real, because for a while, they always are.

You will propose on a hot air balloon. Or during a rock concert. Or very casually next time she’s sick. Over Skype.

You will smile so hard you will wonder why your heart hasn’t burst and bled out all over your chest yet. You will write the story of your lives, have kids with strange names and even stranger tastes. She will introduce your children to the Cat in the Hat and Aslan, maybe in the same day. You will walk the winters of your old age together and she will recite Keats under her breath while you shake the snow off your boots.

Date a girl who reads because you deserve it. You deserve a girl who can give you the most colorful life imaginable. If you can only give her monotony, and stale hours and half-baked proposals, then you’re better off alone. If you want the world and the worlds beyond it, date a girl who reads.

Or better yet, date a girl who writes.”

Monday, 31 March 2014

You'll Forever Be Missed, Grandma

Rest in peace, Mbah. I love you and I always will
This day marked as the worst day in my entire 16 years of livingeven dare I say it's the worst heartbreak I ever felt. And due to all my respect and love for her, I won't write anything that shows my grieve but instead I would love to show my gratitude towards God that I got a chance to feel her warmth and love in this life.

I think, the worst part of losing someone to death is that you don't get to say goodbye properly. They just left, that's all. No goodbyes. The pain will never heal even after months and years went by, it will haunt you for the rest of your life. You'll long for their existence all your life, but it's okay.

Thank you for showing me that real love does exist. I will always cherish the times we spent together and I will always pray for your peacefulness up there. Selamat jalan, Mbah :)

Wednesday, 5 March 2014

Her Perspective on Writing

I have been writing for as long as I live. I still remember the first time my parents bought a computer for me back then when I was still in elementary school. I remember my first writing was about fairies (inspired by Fairy Odd Parents), 'though I didn't quite capture it clearly on my memory.


Beside writing fictions, I was also quite a blogger until junior high days. Then, there was this social media outbreak everywhere. I started pressing the pause button when in high school, I was on Instagram and Twitter a lot back then, even though I was still endlessly write fictions and short story in my laptop. I know that no one's actually read those stories, but still they gave me a liberating feeling; that amidst this uncertainty of life, I could still at least control my stories and the characters inside of them. I could give them a life I could never live.

By the end of high school, I found a suitable platform for my fictions: Wattpad. I went for "Pizzajunkie" as an alias, and decided not to reveal my personal information. What started as a media for me to express, it turns out that people actually loved my stories. It was the first time in my life I gain the recognition and encouragement about my writing. I was confident enough, and my friends started telling me that I'm talented (even though I'm not really sure about that). But in the end of the day, it comes to my realization that when you create something from your heart, it will passed on to the hearts of people who read or see it.

For me, writing is a passion I would never lose affection for. It helps me escape from reality, it heals wound through sentences, it lets me live a thousand lives and see the world from different perspectives. I could be everything I want and be in every places my heart desires.

I write to express, not to impress.

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